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Permalink Reply by terry joven on February 15, 2011 at 2:30pm

Hey Marc...

nice topic!

My daughter called me that last week and told me an interesting story!

She said my grandson anthony who is in the 1st grade was out in the play ground with one of his friends when a bigger kid started pushing his friend.. He told the other kid to stop doing that... the bigger kid turned to my grandson and said to mind his own business or he will hurt him. My grandson told him again to leave his friend alone. So the Bully turned and grabbed him around the neck and started choking him... anthony ducked under the arms and kicked him in the groin..than a teacher came and broke it up befor anything else happened..

Now i don't advocate fighting at school...and i do agree that they need to tell a teacher/principal or an authority person ...but once they try or put their hands on your child he has the right to protect himself..

This story reminded me when i picked up my oldest son also named anthony in 1980 who got into a fight for the same reason.

i was very proud of my grandson for sticking up for his friend and defending himself.

He will make a fine escrimador someday!

 

 

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Permalink Reply by Michael Cardenas on February 15, 2011 at 4:35pm

Good point Marc, when I was a kid my dad told me if I couldn’t talk my way out of a fight with a bully and if I had no other options that I would not get in trouble if used my fist to defend myself.  His advice was hit the bully as hard as you can in the nose. Unfortunately I lacked both combative skills and courage as a kid so I just made friends with biggest kid in school.

 Fast forward many years, and  will be the first person to speak up when I see an injustice being done, thus far I have had to intervene when a guy was physically abusing a women, group of kids harassing one nerdy looking kid and when a drunk guy starting swinging a Jack Daniels bottle at someone’s head.

While I don’t go looking for trouble sometime trouble or circumstances that require that something be said just find you, you can choose to ignore it or have the courage to say something, I tend to speak up all too often which always makes my wife nervous. While I don’t advocate violence, I tend to believe in the idea of “praying for peace while still training for war”. I personally wish more people would have the moral courage to stand up for their principles and stick up for the weak, it’s not easy but it has to be done, otherwise the world will just get overrun by jerks and bully’s if no one is left to stand up to them. Good topic.

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Permalink Reply by Marc Lawrence on February 16, 2011 at 11:30am

Great job Terry with your grandson, he did the right thing you and your family can be proud!

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Permalink Reply by Chris Soriano on February 15, 2011 at 10:04pm

Fortunately, I haven't had to deal with this "bullying" aspect with my now 8 year old daughter.  I do have her training at Bahala Na Multi Style should the need ever arise that she would need to defend herself as I, her dad, is not always around especially since she lives in Tracy while I reside in Reno which is in another state altogether.

 

I've dealt with this topic before, perhaps in one of the forums here.  But it is proper to restate what is hopefully enlightening to some.

 

I have tried the martial artist concept of pretending to be weak when strong.  Of concealing your abilities.  While this may have its place, overall, it didn't work for me.  Who will be picked on?  Those who look like they are indeed weak.  What happened?  I was literally called out as a "victim type", "pushover", "dork".  It didn't matter to me of the name calling so long as nothing else happened, mainly me being hurt or worse.  This bullying has other forms as well such as who is favored at work, who is better treated and so on.

 

While I did not voiced out that I am a martial artist, over time, people and I got into the topic.  Others tried to "jump" me as a joke.  Someone having a bad day, pick on the little guy.  Well he ended up on the receiving end of my reflexes.   Very embarrassing to get beat up by the "dork", even if it was just a joke and simulated.  Another is that I was seen practicing eskrima at a local gym.  What they saw of my capabilities with sticks which can be translated to bladed weapons and practice knives quickly translated to awe.  How humiliating it must be to be roughed up by a "dork"

 

It never occurred to many of these people that while they are aware that I excelled academically and that I have trained/supervised workers as well as managers, that perhaps I would have taken some time to learn to defend myself and excel at that as well.  DUMB.

 

The moral of the story is that even in times of peace, be ready for war.  This translated to me as actually pursuing knowledge in the martial arts and practicing diligently so that I am ready.  Having people around me become aware of my capablities readily translated to respect and more proper treatment from those around me.  People should respect one another.  People should be treated by their own merit.  The world as I see it is not like that.  It is what little skills and knowledge that I have gained in FMA that keeps many would be bullies at bay.

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Permalink Reply by Marc Lawrence on February 16, 2011 at 11:36am

Chris, it is not the size of the person but the size of their heart that sets them apart. Some of toughest strongest men I have met were about 5'2". They have been brave and fierce. Many of these social situations are handle by pure personality.

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